I was almost killed!

So instead of everyone in Wheat taking holidays off, they mark them with the Holiday Flea Market, which is  a big to-do around town.  It’s safe to say that everyone who is not selling, is buying.  Hell, I even saw a few people buy, and then turn right around and sell.
I had a plan to [...]

Fake Louis Vuitton Bags

What’s this shit about Louis Vuitton (”The Ugly Purse People” suing eBay and winning $63 million because they got sore that people were buying and selling phony bags? I can’t even believe it! Do they think everyday folk can afford hundreds and THOUSANDS of dollars on their crummy brown bags? Some of [...]

Sex, Drugs and Bedpans - episode 3

Woo hoo.

First Day

I was up bright and early this Monday, my stomach full of all that anticipation and butterflies that accompany starting a new job.  I walked over to the Bag of Bargains supermarket and introduced myself to the bakery manager Constance Shine, who was 4-cups-of-coffee jittery and seemed very wary of me.  She gave me a [...]

Soap Opera - episode 7

Oh wow….

Miss an episode? Parts: One | Two | Three | Four | Five | Six

Sunday Happenings…

So this morning, I tried to talk Haiku Sue into finding a church we could go to. I read through the listings in the Wheat Register and they had a lot to pick from: Catholic, Lutheran, United Methodist, First Baptist, Congregational and even a Kingdom Hall, as well as a Sanctuary of the Spirit. [...]

Google Me All Over

Hey and all like that. It’s been awhile since I’ve peeked at some of the Google search terms people are typing to find my blog. Here are just a few of the gems:

found grandmas dildo
phone sex mama
tater twister curly cutter
bible for one dollar
how to punish a slut
jody you suck
why are oogie boards evil
i [...]

B-I-N-G-O

The only thing to do in Wheat on a Friday night is get drunk at one of the 37 bars in town or head down to the Wheat Municipal Building to join in the Friday Night Bingo Game. Haiku Sue talked me into going. She called it “cheap fun,” and said if I [...]

Cher’s Hair

Ramona sez:

Check out the Cher pic here.  It’s scary!  LOL

I Lost My Electric Purple Wig!

Oh dear Jesus, earlier today I suffered a tragedy.  I’ve been hanging out at the Wheat Library this week and trying to con Haiku Sue into hiring me part time to stick books back on the shelf and say “hay” to folks and stuff.  Anyhow, there was this hot guy lurking around this morning (in [...]